Here I am

All night, a man called “Allah”
Until his lips were bleeding.
Then the Devil said, “Hey! Mr Gullible!
How comes you’ve been calling all night
And never once heard Allah say, “Here, I am”?
You call out so earnestly and, in reply, what?
I’ll tell you what. Nothing!”

The man suddenly felt empty and abandoned.
Depressed, he threw himself on the ground
And fell into a deep sleep.
In a dream, he met Abraham, who asked,
“Why are you regretting praising Allah?”

The man said, “ I called and called
But Allah never replied, “Here I am.”
Abraham explained, “Allah has said,
“Your calling my name is My reply.
Your longing for Me is My message to you.
All your attempts to reach Me
Are in reality My attempts to reach you.
Your fear and love are a noose to catch Me.
In the silence surrounding every call of “Allah”
Waits a thousand replies of “Here I am.”

 

~ Rumi (r)

 

 

It’s a present

“It’s good to leave each day behind, like flowing water, free of sadness. Yesterday is gone and its tale told. Today new seeds are growing.”

 

~ Mawlana Rumi (r)

 

 

 

Trial me.

“Do not try to run away from trials and tribulations, but endure them with patience. They cannot be avoided, and there is nothing for it but to endure them with patience. How can you expect the whole of this world, and all that has been created therein, to undergo change and transformation just to suit your convenience? The Prophets are the best of all creatures, yet they have always had to suffer afflictions and so it is for their followers, those who tread in their footsteps as they walk along their highway, emulating their example.”

~ Shaikh Abdul Qadir al-Jilani

 

 

 

 

 

 

Students welcoming the Future

I am sure that many of us are now moving on in our lives, moving past things that may seem rather different to how we may have planned. Needlesstosay, different seems frightening but nonetheless equally stimulating. I mean who wants to live the same life, same job, same thoughts, and same opinions.

Invariably life is such, things change, amend and alter and we change accordingly. As many question and challenge their future plans and their choice in studies, others continue studying something they hate with vengeance, lucky ones attend lectures with passion, love and intellectual stimulation which builds hope for the future.

Whatever our situation may be, our road map is still in our hands, for some of us who think that tolerating one’s studies is suffice and enough of a reason to continue, let me tell you now, it really isn’t! I personally do not wish to merely “tolerate” my studies, field of studies or my future for that matter. It takes a little more than a kind of sullen tolerance, a passive form of hostility, a shaky truce.

It is the quality of true engagement with every aspect of our lives, including our education, of which Malcolm X once referred to as “our passport to the future.” How can we attain passion for a field that we cannot even begin to appreciate. Surely if we cannot be bothered to turn up to our lectures, there’s no hope of us ever turning up to work, or putting a skill that we cannot be bothered to learn into practice.

For some of us deriving this passion will take a lot more than just turning up to lectures, it is only through deep thought and contemplation that we as students are able to identify the true value of our studies, and really there is no point of studying something you hate. If you hate to learn about it, what hope is there for its practice. There’s a good old saying that if you pick a field that you love, you will never have to work a day in your lifetime.

Let me illustrate a problem of my own I’ve always mastered the excuse “I’m tired, I have no energy,” I have always used this excuse as a defense mechanism to excuse myself from studies, until someone very wise once said: “If you loved the book you were reading, you wouldn’t be tired, you’d be stocked up on energy.” And that my friend is so true, ironies upon ironies. It’s funny how I would use my lack of energy as a defense mechanism and at that point in time get my ultimate favorite book and read it until my eyes would drop, actually it would drop and I’d go and flush my face with water so I could finish the book. And then it occurred to me, imagine if I had to read the books I love in my studies and it was embodied in every thing I did.

Again, I don’t want to merely tolerate my studies, I want to thrive for it, strive for it and want it in every possible sense. It is this active and open-mind to what fascinates us at the deeper level, through both our phenomenal commonality and our dazzling individuality that enables us to affirm what we want to do with our lives and how we wish to welcome the future. And it is quality of active engagement with oneself that distinguishes our thoughts, our zeal and our destiny.

Einstein once passionately argued: “Education is what remains when one has forgotten everything he learned in school.” It’s taken me a while to actually understand the idea; it certainly is food for a thought. The challenge before us is to go beyond the babble of our insecurities, fear of incompetence, instability in change etc. Just because you feel comfortable in a field, or you know your stuff it doesn’t mean you have passion for it. It is up to us to think and ponder over what steps we wish to take, discover what we want, the universal principles of loving what you’re doing rather than just doing it for the sake of doing it.

Out beyond ideas of right-doing and wrong-doing there is a field. I’ll meet you there.

We all experience personality clashes, at times it can seem an indescribably fierce force, even with our very own siblings.  Our inability to express ourselves in ways intended often means it leaves addressee of our idle talk confused, leaving us misunderstood, misread or even perhaps misconstrued. What hurts is the aftermath… The knowing that it all came out terribly wrong, the anticipation of thoughts of what exactly the other is thinking, the prolonged moments of silence. It’s happened to us all; we’ve let our emotions take a toll on us. Sometimes in my cranky state I have a tendency to have a go at a lot of people, who in essence mean more than words can express.

I am a critic of my own self first and the first to admit that there are many flaws in my character. I have a lot on my plate at the moment, financially, emotionally and spiritually. Resulting in me becoming somewhat restless, impatient, and just generally struggling. 

Rumi (raheemullah) once said: “Out beyond ideas of right-doing and wrong-doing there is a field. I’ll meet you there.” I guess that’s where patience and perseverance with others comes into play. Because at the end of the day I heart you. And this heart hurts others too, so it’s okay for you to hurt me, because I’m sure I’ve hurt you along the way.

Maybe I just need her. Need to be with her. I miss her so! And have been deprived of her for far too long. The only remedy; of whom I’ve deprived myself . Perhaps this is a sign from Him. A sign that I need to reflect on her and focus my priorities on serving her. After all paradise lies under her feet!

May He forgive me for my shortcomings as a sister to my siblings, a daughter to my parents, a student to my teachers and most importantly as a forgetful servant to Him.

Remember this forgetful, inconsiderate, careless, negligent servant in your rememberance of Him.

Prefer a broken neck to another broken heart?

I love my solitude and grow tired and frustrated at the world; so devoid of passion and zeal. It seems, with such oblivious minds unable to fathom the boundless depths in meaning expressed with sincerity, command and devotion, spoken word just isn’t so openly spoken. 

 A poem I recently heard had left me deeply inspired, so inspired that I had to listen to it over and over again, until I was left impenetrably moved and in deep thought and contemplation. For those who have listened with heart, mind and ears intact will appreciate its invaluable passion and message. But for others unable to contemplate the innate message, I feel for thee. Like seriously, feel for thee!

The poem, entitled “She said that she’d prefer a broken neck to another broken heart” by Amir Sulaiman. A narration of distant memories of how a man so deep in love with his upbringing, that his counsel to another is based on this love. It’s almost as though the poem is a love letter to his mother, yet a reminder and counsel to future mothers. A reminder that motherhood and manhood go hand in hand. It is the love, compassion, zeal and sincerity that really makes the poem what it is. 

A message repeated throughout the poem; attaining love for the Divine is more important, fulfilling and rewarding than any other love.  “Having love is even more important than having a lover.”     It reminded me of something that Maya Angelou  once said: “A woman’s heart should be so hidden in God that a man should have to seek Him first to find her.”  How profound? Food for a thought: be so lost in love with Him that no one is able to reach you without reaching Him. “He’s gotta truly love love before he can truly love me.”   How can one who lacks something give it to another?

The poet continually projects the struggles in women today. When asked for solutions, his counsel to another is shaped by his experiences with his mother. “She asked me how I survived, by Allah it was my mother…And the stuff I saw her endure, I never wanna see my wife endure. So I know being a man is more than being male, and I’m focused on doing it right.” It is that linkage to his mother as the centrality to his being, the mention of his mother brought a tear to my eye. Love is certainly the bond that binds the hearts.

When I think about my childhood, I don’t think about poverty. I remember how she hugged me, kissed me, taught me, loved me.” Humble beginnings of poverty to happy endings of grounded foundation;  struggles accompanied by discipline in thought that one is able to re-emerge oneself through his upbringing.  Learn from life’s experiences as a means of better understanding the state of another. 

 The poem ends as it starts “And I know you prefer a broken neck to another broken heart, Broken parts that litter the night sky like stars. But remember, even the beauty of birth leaves its own scars. And know that you will find your home, right where you are; We will find our homes right where we are.” 
 
No other love can replace the love of a mother. All praise be to He most high for giving me such a beautiful, caring and giving mother! A mother who is there, a guardian in times of need, a mother whom I have found my home with, an irreplaceable bond; unique and divine in its own right. May He most high grant us all that home and give us the strength, magnitude and will to provide that same level of love, compassion and mercy to our future generation. Aameen. JazakAllahu khaire to brother Amir for that much needed reminder!

The last whale song

The survival of the fragile marine population is again under threat. Whales are among the most critically endangered species on earth. Some whales are now so endangered they could become extinct within a decade, scientists say. More frighteningly it is said that the 21st century will perhaps see the end of this species above the Equator. Permanently getting rid of the some of the world’s greatest animals so that future generations cannot admire them seems incredibly selfish and pointless. Evidently we can benefit much more from studying and protecting whales than from killing them for minimal benefit. Ocean inhabitants, including whales, are a precious resource for the entire world. One must sincerely appreciate and understand how the termination of this population impacts all of the world’s citizens.

Continue reading…

part 1

part 2

part 3

part 4

“The great enemy of clear language is insincerity”

How can one attempt to reduce a revolutionary 6000 word masterpiece of literary precision without diminishing the essence of its meaning? Here’s my attempted edited version of George Orwell’s masterpiece entitled ‘Politics and the English language.’ After reading you’ll start to realise like I did, why it’s hard to make sense of anything in our time. Ironically simplicity is one of the hardest things to teach, yet Orwell manages to do so with uncanny consistency.

Certainly there is no success in writing effectively unless one writes with simplicity. Orwell counsels to make sense and meaning to what is being said and then formulate the prose, he says to feel or picture the thought before applying its literal definition. Every word spoken can be trapped. Words are just as imitable as identity and can be twisted by those savvy enough to do so. Nonetheless it is clear that propagandas have the power to adapt and marginalise in ways that have undoubtedly surpassed Orwell’s wildest imagination. Yet we as individuals have the power to make a difference through exposing the content of our imaginations with sincerity. Here goes…

“Palestine don’t you cry…

We shall never let you die!” An echoing articulation of compassionate ambiance as thousands of British populace protested opposite Downing Street in London on Saturday 26th January, residence of Prime Minister Gordon Brown. The demonstration prompted by the unfolding humanitarian catastrophe in the Gaza Strip due to the 20-month-long siege illustrated a community upholding the inherent human dignity and decorum, calling for Israel’s brutal illegal siege of Gaza to be instantly lifted.

The struggle for liberty for such a long time by a people is both a poignant sight to the human spirit and fatal to the universal hope for freedom. Palestine: suppressed painstakingly and progressively ruined. The human catastrophe deliberately inflicted on Gaza by western policies over the past two years is one of the great crimes of the century so far. How long can this inhuman treatment continue unchallenged by international leaders?

How and why did we get here? Above all: how do we get out of here? In the wise words of Eli Wiesel: “There may be times when we are powerless to prevent injustice, but there must never be a time when we fail to protest.” Without a doubt, it takes more than just a protest to answer and make a difference, but protesting is the very least that we can do.

Palestine Medical Relief Society (PMRS) said: “The distressing urgency of the current crisis should not prevent us from seeing the bigger picture. The Gaza Strip has been under siege since January 2006. Israel’s policy of collective punishment is not new, but it has now reached such extreme levels of inhumanity that it has finally provoked a reaction from the world.”

26th January had been declared a day of international solidarity. Supported by: Palestine Solidarity Campaign, Palestinian Forum in Britain, British Muslim Initiative, 1990 Trust, Friends of Al Aqsa and Stop the War Coalition. It is hoped that other concerned organisations will be joining and/or supporting this campaign the sole aim of which is to prevent a total humanitarian disaster in the densely populated Gaza Strip. Somehow it is no surprise that the coverage of this protest, despite its newsworthiness, did not make it onto the BBC or Sky News. Amongst the protestors were British Muslims, non-Muslims, Arabs, non-Arabs, Christians, all faiths and no faiths.

Heath’s passing - A heartfelt reminder

  Heartfelt for some and a reminder of death for others, Hollywood actor, Heath Ledger’s death after ‘an overdose of antidepressants’ has spread all over front page news. Google the story and you will get thousands of updates after just a day of the release.  ‘Heath Ledger - the name short for “Heathcliff’ - is an actor who had grown in stature, in sensitivity, in feeling and in creative intelligence.”  

Not that I compel the sympathy or feel completely devoid of compassion that I feel the need to nitpick over the mourn. But rather feel somewhat indebted to express the colossal frustration stemming within vis-à-vis the witlessly diffused journalists who engage in the incessant hearsay about how his life ended, the implications and his motives. Whether this was intentional or accidental overdose of pills, what will a prolonged coverage of the possibilities on national television achieve?    It seems that the media’s apparent incapability to see beyond Hollywood and its anguish for acumen affirms the reality that the medium of news is void of real exposure of the bona fide tragedies prevalent worldwide.

 Need I remind you or myself of the tragedies in Palestine, Iraq, Sudan, and the injustices existing in countless nations?  The lack of exposure and jargon of hard news is rather shocking, I mean how absurd? There are millions dying, suffering and tormented around the world, warlords claiming to spread peace through killing and dishonouring pollutes. Meanwhile we sit and listen to news reporter’s rage and rant about the death of one man, while children globally are victims of mass destruction; children who wake each day with abundant gratitude and hope of living another day, surely the latter must take precedence. 

 Instead of using the media as a means of analysing the death of Heath, why can the media not just leave the family to mourn in peace and utilise the medium of journalism as a means of unfolding with vividness the injustices taking place worldwide?

The news of anyone passing away is always sad. Reminds us yet again that death can come at any moment. “What is the greatest riddle to man? That he sees death all around him yet he thinks he won’t ever die himself.” Perhaps in the very least let’s hope that Heath’s death remains a continuous reminder to us all. Another example of how Hollywood can eat their young. Even when it seems that they “have it all,” they have no internal peace. Evidently, there must be more to life. 

Heath said in an interview before his passing “Acting is also a form of escapism. You put on costumes but what you’re escaping from most of the time is life, the social world.” But whatever he was trying to escape we’ll never really know.

Renowned boxer, Muhammad Ali Clay once said: “This life is not real. I conquered the world and it did not bring me satisfaction.”  And on another occasion when asked about his illness, he said: “God gave me this illness to remind me that I’m not number One; He is.” The perceptible echelon of humility demonstrated by this humble being has an astounding voice of its own.

“Deprivation hurts you….
only because of your incomprehension of God in it
When He gives, He shows you His kindness;
when He deprives, He shows you His power,
and in all that, He is making Himself known to you
and coming to you with His gentleness.“

~Hikm of Ibn Ata’allah

 Heath’s life is a testament to the reality that every being is in need of a deeper meaning of inner contentment, contentment that can and never will be attained through striving for material treasures. We as individuals must always seek a clear life goal and purpose, a rationale which illustrates the proper way to live. The inner dimensions of totality, the path to purpose, meaning and happiness; the path to the source of truth and real power; the path that puts everything is in its proper place. Ultimately, that internal warmth and comfort: a fitting metaphor for wholly putting on our covenants.

 (NB: my condolence goes out to the family, his wife and his daughter.)